Sunday, February 17, 2008

I poured my heart out...it evaporated. See?

Well, it's certainly been awhile. I've been trying to get out of this town for sometime now and it's about to happen. Things in my life are changing...and I am changing incredibly. I can feel the page turning and a great refreshing feeling of a new blank page. I don't know what will happen to me in the future...but I have a feeling that better things are coming very soon. I have a more stable way of thinking and not so flip flop.
Shiner.....geeze where do I start? The constant stink eye from the locals. The narrow minded talk and racisim. The constant talk to football and hunting. And beer is the town's only salvation...not Jesus....beer. They can all deny it all they want...but who do they turn to when things go wrong here 98% of the time? Everyone goes to church here because it "cleanses them"...and they do it because it's what THEIR parents did. It's nothing but a mindless ritual....an excuse to dress up nice and feel good about yourself despite the bad things you've done....it's good for alot of people....a whole lot of sheep.
I really can't put my total trust in someone who isn't "allowed" to have sex or act like a normal human.... BUT IS allowed to tell people how to live. What a load of shit...I'm sorry. It's a brilliant scam if you ask me. I think that a REAL spiritual leader would be one that's well educated and versed in the modern workings of todays society. Not someone who stuffs a large amount of fantasy and not enough reality into their own towns peoples skulls....instilling fear in everyone. Fear is by far...the easiest way to control someone. Hell is man made. When it all comes down to it...nobody knows what happens...nobody knows what made us. We know nothing...I wish everyone would stop acting like they know. It would stop alot of conflict if it was made apperant that it's all a matter of personal opinion. If freedom of personal opinon was totally accepted, everyone could relax and discover their true selves. It's sad that people have surrendered their minds to such nonsense.
Damn....went on a rant there. 5:30am...I'm not going to sleep tonight. Well, I guess I'll have to give it a try. Goodnight.

-Casey