Walk a mile in my shoes...or a few steps.

So I called my mom at work the other day and this is how the conversation went. "First State Bank how may I help you?" "Yes, can I speak with Pat Shimek please?" "Ooooh no, she's out sick today....she's throwing up and got the squirts if ya know what I mean....who is this? Can I take a message?" "Click." No really, I had to hang up...it was that fucking funny to me. God, who just says that to anyone? She didn't even know who I was and she told me that Pat Shimek...my mom....has the squirts. Fucking gold.

The other day at work this lady returned this bag and said "For some reason this bag is just to bulky." I thought to myself....hmmm, could that reason be because it IS bulky.

This other guy at work was trying to return this camera and got all pissed off when Shaun told him he couldn't, so the guy says "Well that's it...I'm never shopping at Home Depot again!" Shaun replied "That's fine sir but you can come back to Circuit City any time you like." Of coarse the guy got pissed and stormed out...funny shit though.

So my warehouse team at work got #1 in the whole company for getting product to the customer in less than 15 minutes. So anyway, they did this article on the circuit city intranet about us and put this really lame picture of me fake running, with some product under my arm and with a ticket in my hand on the site. The boss says I'm a celebrity in the circuit city world because the corporate guys are posting my pics up everywhere...anyway it's funny...you just have to see it.

Well Jenny Janak's son...Benny. Just pooped by my bed again today. This is the second time....I wonder what he's doing that for? Jenny said he never did that before. I wonder if he's mad at me. Trying to poop me out of the house or something. Hmmm. I'll get to the bottom of this pooping buisness.

Well, my scorpion is dying....I don't know why. All of his limbs are paralized except for his tail and stinger. I'll poke at him and he'll just wave that tail around trying to sting me. He might just be old...or have some kind of parasite eating away at his innards. Either way...I think I'm going to have to put him out of his misery today.

So Troy's coming up to Austin with Toni (his girlfriend) tomorrow....I think they're trying to hook me up with this chick called Jimmie. Toni...Jimmie....chicks with guy names. Eh, I never really like being "hooked up" but I'll give it a try if we click.

Got this work party next Friday...the ladies from work want me to go. I'm gonna go...I hope it's a jolly good time and not hip hop till you drop. It's gonna be a ho - down "You bring the hoe's and I'll get down" -Shaun. That guy's funny.

Well, that's what's been going on in my life.

Aye aye aye....sharpen your boot and bludgeon your eye.